Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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