Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
