Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
i think my cat just said my name.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
