No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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