I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
