i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
