i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
If I die, sorry about rent.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
