her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize