just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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