I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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