just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
