im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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