How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize