Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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