It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
