$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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