one might say we're banned from that church
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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