i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
