great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize