do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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