Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Randomize
