I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I am midnight drunk by noon
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
