I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
