Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
