I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I have aggressive nipples.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
