just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I am one with the molecules
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
