if you like me you must not know who I am
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
