if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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