Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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