Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
