I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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