He uses pillows to masturbate.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
