i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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