I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
