Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize