I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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