I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Randomize
