She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
did i walk over a car last night?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
