she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize