Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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