Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
