I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I pour the whiskey from now on
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