Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
we should paint friendship bongs
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
