God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
