physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
