you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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