"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize