WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
