escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
