Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
