Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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